personal evolution

there has never been a time in my life when i fanasized about not working or being a kept woman. if nothing else, feminism seemed to be all that was anti-dependency. i recall proudly stating that i didn't need a man or anyone else for that matter. i looked at women who didn't work with barely concealed disdain....

as i've grown older, my perspective has evolved so greatly that i barely recognize the old me. last month i stopped working for the first time in my life. not since i was an uninhibited child still naive to the world, have i ever felt so free. i'm not joined to corporate america anymore. my life and goals and worth are no longer wrapped up in my title and salary. each day i wake up stress free and happy. i feel blessed for the opportunity. the journey to comfort in this place has allowed me to relinquish pride, learn to trust my life to another and be humble. for someone like me, being unemployed is not just a mere luxury, but a lesson. it is teaching me how to trust on a level i've never had to before. all in all, i love it.

currently, i'm working on business ideas that will allow me to never work for other people again. i have so many ideas in my head, it's hard to focus on just one but i'm trying. right now i'm trying to spec out a budget for the first one to be implemented. look for a website by summer end.

it's funny, i've gotten so sidetracked while writing this, i no longer have the enthusiasm to discuss the other things intended for this blog. one incredibly large sidnote: i have these two HUGE pimples on my right cheek. they're massive. because i tend NOT to suffer from any sort of facial/skin defect, this hurts me more than the average joe pimple face. i keep touching them, rubbing cotton balls full of astingent on them, hoping they'll go away. i'm incredibly sensitive to any sort of acne. i'm the type of girl that has been blessed to have near flawless skin 95% of the year so i have a hard time coping when i'm attacked.

so i'm starting martial arts classes next month. it's only $65/mo and it's taught by black folks. a woman approached me on sunda with a flyer. she sat down on the grass next to me to discss what i was crocheting and then talked about the classes. you can take up to 5 classes/week with that membership. no additional fees. this woman had an amazing body and she was pushing 50. she told me she'd started practicing at my age and was now a 6th degree black belt. i'm so excited abt doing something that allows me to workout and learn something at the same time. i'm also trying to get sherman to take a latin dance class with me. he's still protesting, but he'll come around.

so that's my new life. hustling to get my independent wealth building going and learning new stuff. i'm checking for a lot of summer classes at LA city college. the latin dance and i'm tinking of candlemaking, sewing and pottery. life is so amazing when you have these opportunities. each day, i'm grateful.