$6,399

six thousand, three hundred and ninety-nine dollars

the hospital called today.

apparently i don't qualify for medi-cal b/c i don't have children, i'm not pregnant and i wasn't battered when i needed to go to the hospital.

i still haven't gotten over it.

THIS is exactly why i didn't want to go to the hospital.
my mom convinced me to go with that... "your health is worth it" jawn....
even she gasped when i spat that number at her this morning.
how the fuck am i going to pay $6399 to a hospital?
next time if i get sick... just let me fucking die.
the healthcare system in this country is seriously fucked up.
i'm going into debt for hte sake of my health?
for ONE visit to a doctor?
for that amoutn of money, i feel as if something really should have been wrong with me.
something serious.
i think i'd almost feel better if i'd had a serious illness that was treated.

the woman had the nerve to ask me if i wanted to pay if all straight out....
um yeah, let me just holla at my check book.
so now i'm going to be looking into ways to reduce my bill or at least make payments on it....
can you believe this shit?
i'm so disappointed.
i should have kept my sick ass at home.
here i am reading books about getting out of debt and fixing my credit score
and i racked up over 6g's in debt in 5 hours.
when you think about it, i paying the hospital nearly $1200/hr.

this is so fucking depressing.
i need to find a new vocation or some shit.
i'm tired of feeling broke and like i'm sinking.
unemployment has a way of completely demoralizing you.
why didn't i go to school for nursing or some shit?
something that meant job stability?
i know i'll change my tune when things start to look up....
but right now....
i want to crawl into bed and cry.